June 23, 2021

Impact of Dysfunctional family on children.

I will turn 20 next month and in this article, I am writing everything that I experienced in my 1/4th life utilized.

I am the type of person who doesn’t know who I am? I am confused, broken, sometimes sad, I really don’t know. Maybe it’s just my teen-life crisis. In my life, I did 5 big mistakes( yes 5 and yes I can count them) and those mistakes changed my life in different ways. I am definitely not going to write about them but I would tell you how and why I did them and ended with a life lesson.
All my life I was dominated. I was not able to express myself not even in front of my parents. To be honest they don’t know how to properly raise a child. I don’t hate them. In fact, I tell them what’s right or wrong. Yes, it’s like this with my parents. It’s very complicated. Anyone reading this wouldn’t understand what I am trying to explain. So let’s just leave it here.

According to Google, A dysfunctional family is a family in which conflict, misbehaviour, and often child neglect or abuse on the part of individual parents occur continuously and regularly, leading other members to accommodate such actions. Children sometimes grow up in such families with the understanding that such a situation is normal.

Yes, this all is true. As a child who grew up in such a family, I can assure you every single word of this definition is true.

Parents, I don’t understand why they give birth to a child only if they have to neglect them or compare them with others or have plenty of expectations with them. I was always told to come First in my class like my other cousins. I was always being compared with them in every aspect. In such a case how on earth was I supposed to make my own identity only if I was expected to be like others? On the contrary, I was expected to do the same. To make my own identity. Parents just burden you with their dreams. They don’t think otherwise.

When you start growing, you have multiple thoughts in your mind. Dreams, imaginations, ideas etc etc. You can’t hold them within you for long. You want to, have to express it. When there is no one at your home, you find someone for the same in the outer world. Your age is not much that you can understand what’s right or wrong. You trust anyone who talks to you and shows their support. That’s my mistakes. I don’t know what I did was my mistake or my parents but okay. Nevermind. I learned what life wanted me to learn. So, it’s okay. But do you know the worst scenario of this all? Parents never become tired of blaming you for their mistakes which made you do what you did.

I am just talking about the dysfunctional family who fulfils the essential given in the definition above. Don’t take me wrong.

I just wish whosoever reading this if you are a parent and you compare your child with others, burden them with your expectations, neglect them at times when they need you the most, pressurize them to top every class, don’t listen to them when they talk to you share their ideas with you. Please stop doing it. You don’t know in what ways it will affect them. What mistakes they will do. You don’t know anything. Sometimes a little support means a lot to someone who never got it. Love your child, let them choose their path, support them. We only live once, don’t make them waste it.

If you made it this far, thank you. Reviews and comments are highly acceptable.

Aishwarya Says:

I have always been against Glorifying Over Work and therefore, in the year 2021, I have decided to launch this campaign “Balancing Life”and talk about this wrong practice, that we have been following since last few years. I will be talking to and interviewing around 1 lakh people in the coming 2021 and publish their interview regarding their opinion on glamourising Over Work.

If you are interested in participating in the same, do let me know.

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