Ladki ho thodasa seh lena
aise choti choti cheezon k liye zid nahi karte, ladkiyon ko sab kuch nahi milta,
apne bachon ko kya sikhaoge…
No matter how many times we have heard these sentences, new taunts and comments keep popping up in our lives every single day. We do not know how many General Managers, Vice Presidents, Doctors, Lawyers and other professionals are staying at home. Just because they are scared of these sentences.
For me my biggest inspiration and teachers in life are Time and Life. Both of them can teach you innumerable lessons if you wish to learn. I am a beliver of Karma but I also feel that if you do not communicate at the right time then, there is no use blaming the world for your miseries. Communication solves 99.9% of the problems in the world, but how often do we understand the nuances of communication.
I have been working with a lot of women, who wish to return back to their career but still they are unable to do so, as they cannot communicate their desire to do so. In our Country, whether it is a boy or a girl, our professions are always pre-decided by either our elders or our neighbours. We barely ask anyone,what do they want to do in life. Young boys are taught since young age, that they need to study well and earn well so that they can get whatever thye want and girls are asked to study well so that they can get a good husband who can provide them with what they want.
When I speak about communication, it is not only about how well you can speak but also about your listening and understanding skills. A lot of times we just presume that as elders, we know what is the best for out children and women. Without understand what do they want. Probably that is the major reason why today, we do not have the best professionals with the best skillsets. As the people, who have the desired skilled set are often lost.
Coming back to the basic topic on women who want to return back to their careers. I personally believe that Husband and Children are a phase they are just a part of your life and not your entire life. Your career is also an important part of who you are. Yes, sometimes, it is practical that either of the parent stays back with the child, but that parent can also be the father if required.
Our society thinks that it is important that the women should only raise children and look after the well-being of the family and finance is something that should not be her forte. But how many times, are we women ourselves ready to help each other ? How many times, are we accomodating and adjusting with other women, and understand their situations ? Are we women Communicating with each other enough ? Are we really empathising with each other and helping each other grow ?
When I talk about effective communication, it means expressing our requirements directly and not by adding unnecessary details. Everyone has their own set of challenges, so if you are going to spend half your time in cursing others and talking about other people’s lives, trust me nobody will entertain you.
Yes. We women also have our set of flaws, but everybody just points them out to us, they barely tell us how to rectify it and work ahead. Hereunder are our few flaws, which are generalised by the society and also a solution on how we can rectify the same.
Women Gossip a Lot
Yes, we women love to talk and express ourselves. We do not keep anything in our minds and therefore we need to share the same, with whoever, comes in front of us. We just look out for topics to talk with others and therefore the content of other’s lives makes it more interesting for us.
Just be a good listener. You do not have to share the information about every person you know to the world. Trust me people can do the same to you and you would not like it.
Women always need to run home
Yes, we are always in a hurry to run home because we need to cook before the men reach home, we need to deal with our children’s home works and put them to bed before the fathers come home, we need to buy the vegetables before the market closes down. So if the Schools and Corporates, teach equal parenting and equal gender responsibility, it would be so much easier for a lot of women to come back to their workplace.
Women do not need Careers post marriage
Yes. Our husband’s have a good job , but we also have worked hard to build our careers for ourselves. Yes, it is important to balance our work and family life, but it is the responsibility of both the spouses. Just one person staying back home is not going to help the children. Children need both father’s and mother’s equally. You may not have a full time job but doing something just to stay in touch with your previous profession or doing something new is important. The women of the house staying happy is more important than anything else.
Speak in public about how you manage work and family together. Share simple tips. You never know whom you may end up inspiring.
Women cannot handle technical post
I think the person who says this should be first permenantly banned from speaking. Your gender does not play any role in the job profile. Your Technical knowledge about the subject plays a major role.
Women cannot do this and that….etc (add all the rubbish that you ever heard)
Just turn a deaf ear and ignore them.
Instead of going overboard about our problems. It is important that we effectively communicate about our issues with the society and the person concerned.
I have come across a lot of women, who first dominate and say all the lies in the world and then play the victim card. I also know a few women who think women empowerment means abusing the front person.
Dear Women, it is high time that we the silence against the myths that is existing in the society about us. It is important that we effectively communicate about our problems, solutions and concerns to the society.
2020 has been mean to all of us. Let us #BreakTheSilence, and talk to world about us. Remember ladies, Self Love and having your own choice does not make you selfish. Stop falling into the trap laid down by the society.
#BreakTheSilence with Fertility Dost, India’s trusted platform for managing fertility health. #FertilityDostContest.
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Thank you Sridevi for entertaining me